The Mystery of the Playboy Twister Mat

Nothing is more fun than a game of Twister. That's a lie. I can't think of a time I've even played Twister. But I think it could be reasonably fun. That was my thought process when deciding to bring Playboy Twister to Cabo.

We found the spinner and shipped it last month. I scoured the closet and couldn't find the mat that goes with it. The point of the story isn't that I found the mat though. We just decided to print a new one. The final will look slightly different from the first mock-up below.

The NEW PlayboyU Twister mat... minus naked women.

However, I did find the original Playboy Twister mat online while checking out the search results for "Playboy Spring Break". I really enjoyed this picture, so I felt the need to share. It is quite apparent that the old twister mat got some good mileage. Nice VHS camcorder that the guy on the left has... top of the line. Any guesses for what year this was taken? 1997?

An "adventurous" young woman gets down on the Playboy Twister mat. Yeah, I blurred her nipples. Sorry.

Playboy Spring Break 2008 won't be nearly as "hardcore". We won't have wet t-shirt contests or anything like that. It's Cabo San Lucas, you have to keep it classy. Girls won't be taking their tops off at our events, but I'll try to arrange that for other times during the week.

Playboy Spring Break Update Numero Uno

As you may know, I'm getting ready for Playboy Spring Break 2008 in Cabo San Lucas. My efforts have included trying to get in shape and also getting as pale as possible in cold New York. In a mere two weeks, I will be in the middle of thousands of crazy-fucking-drunk college kids. I should be right at home.

Breann McGregor gives Official Chris Duncan some love... photograph by Chad Doering with my camera


This year, we're doing even more in Cabo than ever before. So sit back and relax as I "break it down" for you fools. People often ask me how much Corona and Cuervo it takes to master the science of Spring Break. It takes exactly 120 Mexican Coronas and 50 Cuervo shots. I figured that out last year much like the owl in the Tootsie Pop commercial. What's happening other than drinking? Casual sex... and some great Playboy events! Seriously. Next update, I'll introduce you to the cast of characters, but here's what's happening...

Miss Playboy Mobile Spring Break

Tuesday March 11 Afternoon @ Nikki Beach
Location is still TBD, so don't lock it in just yet. Keep checking for updates because you won't want to miss this. I will do my best to select the finest women in Cabo to participate in the Miss Playboy Mobile competition. The winner of our event will go on to the finals in Las Vegas on April 2nd at The Palms. Sorry guys, there's no nudity in the contest or final photoshoot. I'll have my digital camera handy though...

Rock the Rabbit Concerts at Cabo Wabo Cantina

Saturday March 8 Evening @ Cabo Wabo - Your Vegas
Last year, Your Vegas killed at Cabo Wabo. So we decided it was a good idea to bring them back. Since we locked them up late last year, they signed with Universal. At the beginning of 2008, they joined The Bravery on their US tour. The young men of Your Vegas are suddenly blowing up. Those fuckers were supposed to let me play on their indoor soccer team for free, but they never set it up. Lazy bastards.
Saturday March 22 Evening @ Cabo Wabo - Beasts of Eden
Carter McLean and his band gave a fantastic performance at the Playboy offices last year. They were so good that we're bringing them to Cabo with us. Carter (who has a bad ass name... his middle name is Powers) couldn't bring a drum set to the office. He was playing on what looked like a wooden box that produced a sizeable thump. He later revealed that the instrument was called a "cajon". That's "box" in Spanish. Maybe Carter can get some use out of that espanol in Mexico.

Rock the Rabbit Mash Up Concerts

Sunday March 9 & Tuesday March 11 - David Sides
The Mash Up concept had been floating around our office for a while, but it wasn't complete until we found David Sides. My partner in crime, Charlie Romano, sent us a link to his YouTube video and we called his management before the end of the day. We locked David in for the first week of Spring Break. The hardest part was finding a functional piano in Cabo San Lucas. We found one at Passion. If that doesn't work out, we might be screwed. Apparently, there's a piano museum in a mountain town a couple hours from Cabo San Lucas. Hopefully, we don't have to borrow from them.

Sunday March 23 & Tuesday March 25 - Paul Dateh & DJ inka one
Paul and DJ inka one just passed a million views on their extremely popular YouTube clip. Their collaboration with Beasts of Eden should be fantastic. Paul was recently in New York to perform with Public Enemy's DJ Johnny Juice. He also stopped by our office when he wasn't doing a piece with RocketBoom or meeting with Chuck D. We gave him some shirts and wristbands, so he probably likes us more.

Those are the individual events of note. We're somewhere every afternoon and night for about three days in two separate weeks. The listing of events is below. Feel free to leave any questions you may have in the comments.

Playboy Spring Break Week 1

Appearances by Playmate Shannon James and Cyber Girls Jennifer Hurt, Megan Hauserman, and Amanda Hanshaw

• March 8 Evening (Cabo Wabo) - Your Vegas concert
  
• March 9 Afternoon (TBD) - Playmate/Cyber Girl signing with David Sides performance
  
• March 9 Evening (TBD) - Bar party
  
• March 10 Afternoon (Billygan's Beach Club) - Beach games & Playmate/Cyber Girl signing
  
• March 10 Evening (Zoo Bar) - Playmate/Cyber Girl appearance @ reserved tables
  
• March 11 Afternoon (TBD) - Miss Playboy Mobile competition
  
• March 11 Evening (Nowhere Bar) - Farewell party
  

Playboy Spring Break Week 2

Appearances by Playmate Lindsay Wagner and Cyber Girls Jessica Danielle, Jillian Beyor, and Aubrie Lemon

• March 22 Evening (Cabo Wabo) - Beasts of Eden concert
  
• March 23 Afternoon (TBD) - Playmate/Cyber Girl signing with Paul Dateh/DJ inka one performance
  
• March 23 Evening (TBD) - Bar party
  
• March 24 Afternoon (Billygan's Beach Club) - Beach games & Playmate/Cyber Girl signing
  
• March 24 Evening (Zoo Bar) - Playmate/Cyber Girl appearance @ reserved tables
  
• March 25 Afternoon (TBD) - Paul Dateh & DJ inka one performance
  
• March 11 Evening (Nowhere Bar) - Farewell party
  

Tying Up Loose Ends

Just in case you were holding your breath waiting for closure, here are some updates on previous items. If none of the below is confusing, then you read my blog way too fucking much.

OCD INTERVIEW: MARK FRAZIER & BLAIR O'NEAL
I've been in some recent correspondence with Blair, who was one of my bodypainted models. Looks like she'll probably work at the Playboy Golf Scramble in Phoenix. Recently, I've had a Playmate, the Playmate "mother", and the guy who runs Playboy Golf tell me to come out to LA for the Scramble Finals. I've never been to the Playboy Mansion, so this would be a great time to do that. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. I'm going to be in Cabo until the day I'd need to be in LA. So that's either really good or really bad. Now, I have to convince them to fly me there...

AMERICAN GLADIATORS SUCKS
I don't really think I need to go over this again.

FIRE ISIAH @ MSG
I made the signs and the Knicks lost... so that part went as planned. I couldn't get everybody into it though. Maybe that's a good thing. Since we could've been kicked out for having a FIRE ISIAH sign.

BECOMING LESS FAT
Recap coming later.

TRASHING THE BUCKET LIST
I'll never see this movie and I'm nearly positive that it's a piece of shit. It did much better than the horrible failure that I predicted. I said 45 with a max of 60 mill at the domestic box office. That was obviously insane. I had originally typed 60 with a 75 million domestic box office as a ceiling. It'll probably peter out before it even sniffs $100 million which should be within the next few weeks.

National Tragedy: Kevin Durant Eats a Booger

Well, this makes me feel like an ass. This is the best Texas Basketball recruit of all-time doing something a toddler shouldn't do. At least you don't see VY eating boogers. Thanks to DChu, probably the biggest Texas-hater that I know, for this link. Check out the video below for the greatest ass slap of all time.



Damion James doesn't fuck around when it comes to attaboys on the backside. Here's the proof. AJ Abrams probably had a mark on his cheeks after that forceful show of affection.

OCD Classic: The Hip Hop Magician!

Uncle Majic AKA The Hip Hop Magician is one of my new favorite people. I caught his commercial on TV earlier today. We were catching up on Rock of Love 2 when this gem came on. This is a great commercial. I've transcribed the script below:
Uncle Majic: Hi I'm Uncle Majic the hip hop magician!
Shock-Kim: And I'm Shock-Kim the clown!

Uncle Majic: I'm who the celebrities call for their kids' birthday parties!
Shock-Kim: NO! I'm the one that the celebrities call for their kids' birthday parties!

Uncle Majic: We have
Uncle Majic: Magic shows
Uncle Majic: Balloon animals
Uncle Majic: Games for kids
Uncle Majic: Popcorn machine
Uncle Majic: Cotton candy machine
Uncle Majic: AND bouncing castle

Uncle Majic: Call for yo kid birthday party!
Uncle Majic: 718-892-0760

Uncle Majic: Who's your favorite uncle?
Kid: Uncle Majic!!

The commercial is classic. Best line is obviously "Call for yo kid birthday party". I'm definitely considering calling him for my birthday party next month. He actually looks like he's a nice guy. Shock-Kim the Clown is probably a very sad motherfucker. Does anybody disagree with that statement? I really don't think he's the one who celebrities call for their kids' birthday party. The magically appearing party components were amazing as well. I bet that's his cell number that he lists.



The website is great too. "While levitating dollar bills and cans of soda or pulling pigeons out of thin air, his DJ spins the hottest rap tunes". You should check out the photos sections. He has two good ones with Russell Simmons. The bottom line of "Who the Celebrities Call for their Kids Parties" is an excellent selling point. Who wouldn't be excited when Uncle Majik pulls up in his wrapped (possibly) 300Z? You also shouldn't forget that he's "As Seen of TV". Uncle Majic has a professional marketing team behind him and he has no problem showing off their creative prowess.

Mobile Post: Praying My Flight Is Delayed

Official Chris Duncan is an official dumbass. I locked my rental car keys
in the car. Now Im waiting for a locksmith to reactivate the Ford
Fusion. My flight is at 1:20 and its just about noon. Its going to
take about 30 minutesto get to the airport and another 30 to return
the car, take the shuttle, and check in. I'm possibly fucked. Wish me
luck.

Mobile Post: At a College Apt

I'm at a BU college apt. Nothing posses me off more than people not
having fun. Fuck Maxim. Fuck Heidi. Fuck any jackass that uses 10 oz of
gel every day.